Impact of Marrying Foreigners:A Personal Experience

Whenever i am blog hopping,80% of the blogs i will be spotting will be by a Filipina married to a foreigner. WOW!!! I have this great feeling of excitement that ,"hey there are sooo many of us!" There will be more and more since the impact of internet on interracial marriages is sooo dramatic, widespread and powerful.

When i was a little girl whenever i heared a Filipina married to a foreigner(Australian,European,North American,etc...) i got sooo excited. My mom originally is from Negros Oriental and my dad from the Cebu Province. Whenever we went to these places --- Cebu, Dumaguete, Tanjay, Bais, etc... etc... usually the bigger houses on the community are owned by Filipinas married to foreigners. For example, The La Hacienda Hotel in Tanjay, Negros Oriental is owned by a Filipina married to a British --- a Filipina who once was a very poor girl whose parents can't even afford a small lot now owns a huge hacienda. Whether we accept it or not, that was possible because of her marriage to a British.

Now, let us be honest here : why do we marry foreigners? Okay, of course, LOVE,LOVE,LOVE. What a sweetest thing in the world! But is it just it? I mean, come on, look at our country! Look at that old man in the airport who can hardly even walk who got a 20 year old wife and he's more than 80! Come on, let us be honest!

Of course, there are really lucky ones who married because of true love, but honestly, there are others who married because they saw it as the only way out in a country where extreme poverty is prevalent. Take for example: I'd known a native woman(a B'laan tribe) who can't even speak a word of English and married to an English. Now, okay, you tell me action speaks louder than words, but oh, dear, can you live in a country very much different from yours with a person whom you can't even understand the word he speaks???? Okay, of course, she had survived. Little by little she learnt. And isn't that amazing how strong our coping mechanism is? We need to because there is no real hope for our country! For her, better to marry a foreigner than being a domestic helper (sometimes the working agency will trick you and only get your placement fee!) or being a wife to a Filipino who loves cockfighting and treats his roosters as more valuable than his wife! (Ah, i know, i know, i am just being real here, i knew lots of Filipino husbands who love cockfighting! Asked Manny Paquiao if he loves his fighting cocks more than Jinky? Probably? Ah, Sorry i am out of the topic now!!!!).

There is big impact on marrying a foreigner. Personally, it is a great impact. Okay, i had finished my education and probably would land a good job and probably had married any of my former Filipino boyfriends. But i might not got the chance to go to Paris or any first class travel destinations. Okay, we might got the chance to go but not when we are 27 or 28 0r 30 years old? probably when we will be 50 or 60? or probably not at all? I don't know, i am just only guessing. And i am only speaking in general.

But anyway, I think God had answered my mother's prayer that i will marry a foreigner !(I knew she always looked happy whenever i broke up with my former Flipino boyfriends!). It was a long-time dream of my mom for me to marry a White Guy. I really understand why. The rate of unemployment in the Philippines is too high. With one available job there might be 2000 applicants, and don't apply if you got no back-up!!! And with a population that is surging so high every day, resources are not enough! My mom also knew that by me marrying a foreigner the chances of having a good, comfortable life is higher than being married to a fellow Filipino.(Now, Filipino guys don't get mad at me!!!! I am only telling the truth!). I always believe that MOTHERS KNOW BEST! So, as a good daughter, i heeded my mom's advice. But really, it was the best choice i made in my life!

I still believe this is FATE. I still believe that God has plans to each one of us. My personal experience had been truly amazing and the impact is quite impressive. For more of my personal experience, you can read my Cinderella Story.

Probably the greatest impact i can give in marrying my wonderful, white husband? The mixed kids that we have. The "mestizo" children are the greatest impacts of all! And if you ask me if i married my husband because of LOVE? Big YES. And did i marry him for me to have a good, secured future? BIG, BIG YES! But most of all, because of love!

Are You a Vulture or the Photographer?

A bleak , heart-breaking scene of a child starving, collapsing due to famine,due to starvation,due to extreme poverty and a stalking,hungry vulture ready to attack his prey. If you are the photographer what would you do on that particular moment? Would you rather save the child or would you rather take the photo?

Of course the famous and fearless photojournalist, Kevin Carter took that Award-winning photo last 1993 in Sudan. He got a Pulitzer Award for it in 1994. But few months after receiving the award, he committed suicide. Probably, he was haunted by the horrific images of Sudan especially the image of that dying,thin as a stick child with the vulture stalking him.

I post this photo because i keep on thinking about this image in my mind. I am asking myself am i the vulture? or the photographer? How would you interpret the photo yourself? In the Philippines, this week is called Holy Week. So, this photo might help us reflect a little bit of ourselves especially during this Holy Week Celebration.

My interpretation: the child represents extreme poverty,war,disease,etc...The vulture represents selfishness, power, fear, injustice. And the photojournalist? He represents opportunism. He represents many of us who sometimes doesn't care what others feel as long as our goals will be fulfilled even if we step on others' feet. Somebody who has the capacity to help but seems so blind.

The picture has huge impact on me. How about on you?